寫在前面：這個課程真的是我目前最喜歡的課程，沒有之一。不僅因為講述了很多治愈的句子，還有很多實操的方法，而且每節(jié)課將近90分鐘，整個課程跟下來，會像慢慢品味一頓滿漢全席一樣，細嚼慢咽各種菜品，到了最后一課，作為屏幕面前的我都有些舍不得結束。所以真的強烈強烈強烈地推薦給大家。
這是積極心理學的最后一課，也是Tal老師在哈佛大學講授積極心理學的最后一課，課程的最開始就有一些傷感散發(fā)于整個教室。
Tal老師在這節(jié)課上做的除了播放一支關于saying goodbye的視頻之外，第一件事是問學生們，我現(xiàn)在非常緊張，我該怎么辦？
學生們回復了很多答案，也剛好是之前Tal之前課上教授的方法，比如深呼吸、冥想、鍛煉、擁抱某人，以及，it’s ok to be nervous, 緊張很正常，接受它的存在。
接著，讓學生寫出這學期至少兩件對自己特別有意義的事兒，同時也寫出兩個對自己的承諾，可以是行為上的改變，也可以是態(tài)度上的改變。
再然后，讓同學們站起來分享一下，當然第一個吃螃蟹的人會需要巨大的勇氣，所以Tal鼓勵說，“courage is not about not having fear, it’s about having fear and going ahead anyway. If courage was about not having fear, I would not be teaching this class. ”
分享的過程中，Tal大多也會做出點評，或點頭稱贊，或補充說明，比如有的同學說以前自己有拖延癥，聽了Tal老師的課知道了，拖延癥實際并不可怕，而且大多數(shù)人都有，于是Tal補充到：“70% of students in universities complain about procrastination, it’s a huge issue, and one of the ways to overcome it, the best way to overcome it is to just do it, just start. Remember the five minute take-off, that’s so important. ”
之后學生也提到了：
1. appreciate
2. the most personal is the most general
3. learn to fail or fail to learn, it’s part of our life.
4. more is not always better. not easy to simply, that’s so very important.
5. every day is a beautiful day and to be grateful for that somehow makes it easier to go out and try to do things that maybe even we didn’t like.
還有一個學生站起來的發(fā)言很有意思，因為她并沒有什么特別想說的，而是就在話筒握在自己手里的時候，希望說些什么，于是就站了起來，表達完之后，贏得了大家一致的掌聲，是呀，這就是由自己主動的行動而引發(fā)的變化，一個非常活生生的例子。
還有一個即將畢業(yè)的大四學生說了一段感人肺腑的話，也表示自己到大四才上這門課的遺憾，她說，整個大學階段，最重要的并不是你的論文、你的一些討論的問題，而是周圍的同學，因為當你畢業(yè)了以后可能再也沒有機會和他們共度美好時光了，“it’s very important to prioritize what is meaningful for you and what you really, really want to do in this school, because before you know it it will over.”
接下來Tal講述的內容主要是對以往課程的一個總結。他告訴學生們，你們畢業(yè)后的生活依舊會是起起伏伏，不同的是你知道了這很正常，接受那些不如意的事兒，就像接受萬有引力一樣。
you are going to continue to have those ups and downs, the only difference i hope that you will experience now is that when you experience a painful emotion you will look at it and say “oh, i’m human, it hurts, i wish it weren’t that way, but i accept it, just like you accept the law of gravity. because the law of gravity is as much part of physical nature as painful emotion is a part of human nature.” permission to be human.
簡化你的生活！在現(xiàn)實生活中有越來越多的好事兒，但是我們需要不斷的做減法，在適當?shù)臅r候說不，找尋出對你真正重要的事兒，并為之努力。
there can be too much of a good thing, easier said than done to simplify. but remember that a much better predictor of well being than material affluence is time affluence. simplify. assert yourself say no at times when it’s appropriate, find out what you really really want to do with your life and do it.
培養(yǎng)親密關系，投入你的時間。
to cultivate relationship means to invest in them, to put time into them, to share, to open up.
“雞尾酒”的四個組成部分分別是：
1. 每周四次鍛煉，每次30分鐘
2. 做瑜伽或者冥想，如果時間不允許，那就多做幾次深呼吸
3. 每天大概8小時的睡眠時間
4. 觸摸、擁抱
1. exercise at least four times a week for 30 minutes
2. if you can, if you are interested, do some formal yoga or mindful meditation, sitting meditation, if not, at the very least breathe, breathe deeply a few times a day. three deep breathes can make a big difference.
3. sleep. when possible 8 hours or somewhere around 8 hours a night of sleep
4. and touch. hug, embrace- and underused sense is so important.
讓別人逐漸的了解你，而不是急于讓他人給你肯定，尤其是在培養(yǎng)親密關系的時候。
be known rather than be validated. whether it’s with our romantic partner, our family, our friends, our colleagues, our class. the foundation of the growth of intimacy and passion in long term relationships.
最后Tal老師再次強調“改變”，因為所有的這些方法，雖說堪稱靈丹妙藥，但如果沒有行動，那么和沒有上過課的人將完全一樣，沒有任何變化。
Peter Drucker said "Don’t call me to tell me how wonderful it was, call me and tell me what you are doing differently." This is the core of change.
Carlton’s study shows that the people who succeed, the most who are the happiest succeed the most in the ultimate currency in a long term ones who are lifelong learners, always asking questions, always finding out more. but there are many people with good intentions, but good intentions are not enough. what we also need is the foundation, the empirical, rigorous, scientific foundation of things that work. and when we know these things, then we pay them forward, then we share them.
最后，Tal說了一段話，是精簡的總結，也是非常暖心的叮囑：
So each time you go to one of those wonderful places, exotic or otherwise, remember to simplify, remember to take care of yourself, remember to exercise, remember to assert yourself and say no when appropriate, remember to cultivate your relationships, remember what it is that is really really important for you in your life.
所以今后大家無論在何時何地，都記得要給生活做減法、記得照顧好你自己、記得鍛煉、記得懂得拒絕、記得培養(yǎng)親密關系、記得在你的生命中，什么對你才是真真正正重要的。
